The Inner Game
It’s amazing sometimes what can open the door to anxiety within and how going alone to an outside concert two minutes from your house can seem like such a small thing, yet it can lead us to a breakthrough in a moment of doing something new or different.
You know when you are questioning whether you’re to go and you are thinking you are hungry, yet you know its more that one aspect of your inner self is playing a little game called self-sabotage.
The more that side plays its part, the more that other hidden part is grabbing you by the hand to get you to take the first step in climbing over that wall by guiding you to put the makeup on, the shoes, grab a sweater and quickly share with your roommate where you are heading before the self saboteur catches wind that you have momentarily stopped as your other self races for the door pulling you along.
It's such an unexpected feeling and one that wasn’t there, hadn’t surfaced until a half hour before I was due to leave.
This was literally the first Friday out of eight that I’ve been able to attend – no pet visits or Overnights tonight.
Who knew that yesterday which was warm would shift today by beginning with rain followed by wind, and boy am I glad to have grabbed that sweater and have jeans on as it is being held in an open parking lot at AJ’s grocery and its such a drastic shift in temperature. They have tables and chairs set up. It’s a free concert, they have one more for the season next Friday the 25th. They run in April and October.
Here’s a snippet from the band: https://www.youtube.com/watch?si=sattAP7jTr9InQCj&v=XJx-lM303Ww&feature=youtu.be
The last time I did something like listening to a live band, it was at a coffee bar here in Arizona - however the one I most recall is when my parents and I lived in Marietta, Georgia we would go to a local coffee shop and listen to whatever band was there. It brings up happy memories.
Tonight it’s just me, listening to the music while writing this blog. I would say that this experience is about being comfortable in your own skin regardless of whether with a group or solo. Sometimes it’s about choosing the hard to break through the comfort barriers.
Getting out of the house, then out of the vehicle, asking questions, taking a seat at a table with others and being okay with being me in a crowd of unknown people.
You may be thinking it’s a benign experience, yet as someone who is somewhat of an introvert - this is where I’d prefer to be amongst some friends. That said, in my opinion I am doing well. A win in my book on this round of the inner game!
